There are two basic ways of making sweet love in the kitchen. There is the spontaneous “quickie” where you are using ingredients that you just had laying around the pantry and the fridge, waiting patiently for someone to caress them. Then there is the well thought out “can’t walk the next day” session. This is where you spend some serious time menu planning, shopping, prepping, cooking, setting of the table, shining the silverware kind of lovemaking. They are both equally good and satisfying, but I tend to prefer the “can’t walk the next day” to the “quickie” only because I am a chef and a major stickler for detail. So with that being said, let’s focus on the “can’t walk the next day” kind of love.
Menu planning is like foreplay in the kitchen…shopping in LA on the other hand is like a bad kisser…you work with what you’ve got but it can be a major turn off. I usually start each meal inspired by one sole ingredient, whether it be a spice, a veggie, or a protein of some sort. I like to peruse my cookbooks and magazines searching for something that I haven’t used in a while or that I know is in season. Once I find that one thing that has gotten my juices flowing, I decide what kind of ethnic “position” I want to take. Am I in the mood for some spicy Mexican or Thai lovemaking? Some sweet and salty Japanese? Some romantic slow Caribbean or maybe I will just let the ingredient dictate. Just take yourself to the market and start with that ingredient and go with it. Either way, you must take your time choosing just the perfect tools to use to cook with love. Before I start, I like to explore my ingredients. How do they like to be cooked? How many different ways can I arrange them on a plate? Once I begin the preparation, I really like to taste everything as I am going along. This builds excitement and anticipation and allows you to adjust your seasonings. Don’t just follow a recipe. This is the very first thing to remember when cooking with love. You are solely responsible for your ingredients and that means putting in the effort to make that food your bitch! Any Neanderthal can follow a recipe, but it’s the understanding of the ingredients that brings the love. Everything else should come naturally.
Now, when cooking with love it is also essential to have a good setting. Setting the table is equivalent to the lighting of the candles and putting on just the perfect music part of the lovemaking process. . DO NOT wait until the last minute to set your table. You don’t light the candles when you are done with the lovemaking; you do it before to add to it! If you take the time to do the setting right, it only adds to what happens in the kitchen. You wouldn’t serve a fine wine out of a plastic cup or a tasty rack of lamb on a paper plate would you? I also find this essential when it’s just a “quickie”. You will feel the love much more if it’s eaten in a beautiful setting. Those people who actually eat in fast food restaurants are beyond my help, I fear.
Plating of the food is also a very important part to cooking with love. You want the food to look enticing. You want your guest or guests..If you’re into that sort of thing…to ooh and ahh. Food always tastes better if it looks amazing. It is psychological. Just like when that super hot guy was better than you thought he was…just because he was soooo HOT! Food is that way too. BUT, if you put enough love into it, you can’t go wrong.
So these are the basics to cooking with love or making sweet love in the kitchen. It’s not so much about the tools and techniques as it is about the attitude and effort. Next time we will touch base on the quickie. I know…you are asking yourself why didn’t I start with this because it’s what most people are used to. I guess I am just trying to inspire you to spice it up a bit! Get those creative juices flowing people!